I have lived away from my Mums house since April 2016. I have lived in Smethwick, Cairns, Melbourne and Sydney. In 2016 I have been paying rent to a private landlord in three different houses.
Rent in the UK is allot cheaper than Australia. I mean if you can find a room for 60-100GBP a week in any city (apart from London) then you are doing well. In Sydney if you can get a room to rent (for yourself) for $140 a week then you have caught a bargain.
In July-August 2015 I lived in Bearwood with a man called James. He was younger than me but he was also my landlord. He was such a good person to talk with and he never bitched and moaned about anything. I even brought him stuff for the house.
In 2016 I lived at 12 Bowden Road Smethwick with Romanian Couple and a Polish man called Marino. After 9 days I walked the fuck out of my Smethwick house because the Romanian guy (Dragos) & the Mario were confronting me about body odours and smells.
My landlord Kevin was a nice guy but he conned me to pay a deposit to secure the place (before I even got to the UK) and because I walked out without a months’ notice he only gave me back 190 quid. So I lost 3 weeks rent and a couple of quid for having a fucking xenophobic outburst against 2 immigrant pricks who have no damn right to be living in the UK, taking my jobs and PUSHING ME AROUND on my home turf.
So when you are looking for rooms to rent in the UK (or anywhere else) here are a few warning signs about horrible housemates as well as things that can rip you off
- Housemates that come from Eastern Europe (who can’t speak good English) to live in the UK.
You will never ever have a decent conversation with a Pole, Hungarian, Bulgarian, Serb or whatever. You’re better off knowing phrases in their mother tongue.
When you live with Eastern Europeans, you are living in their world. They are homesick so they surround themselves with native products rather than buying British.
In the UK you are best to live with people who speak your own language. It doesn’t matter if they are: Indian, Pakistani, Black British, Ulster, Scottish and Welsh. If you both speak good English you will get along well.
2. The worst housemates are the pricks who NEVER clean up their mess or put things away.
Are you sick of coming home from work and you see on the dishwashing rack a whole bunch of plates, cutlery or cups that should be back in the cupboard. This is a sign that your housemates are too fucking lazy to put away their own shit.
If you can be ANAL about it, you’re better of asking nicely
Like: Livia could you please put away your dishes?
When I lived on Princes St in Flemington, my housemates would never clean out the sick or even clean the stove tops. I did my own cleaning and for the first 2 weeks I ate off paper plates.
3) Leaving food out created bad smells, attractive insects and pest and makes you sick.
Ok it’s alright to put biscuits in a jar and leave them on the counter but you wouldn’t want to be a total dipshit by leaving the jar lip off. Ants would crawl inside, the biscuits would go stale and there’s your $3 down the drain in uneaten food.
People who leave food out whether it’s in a pot or on a plate are nothing but a jackass who want to get salmonella poisoning. If you see food outside then tell the owner to put it away
3) Signing a lease agreement is bullshit.
You are better of being a lodger than a tenant. Reason being you don’t pay any bills, you buy your own stuff but your host has a few things you need.
When you live as a lodger you basically get a bed with clean sheets, cutlery to use, plates to eat off etc. You just have to pay for food and buy supplies for your host.
Signing a tenancy agreement is a deal with Jesus. It basically say Stay here for at least 6 months, put up with your other wanker flatmates, you break anything it goes out of your bond or deposit.
So whatever you do, don’t put a deposit down or sign a tenancy agreement of leasing agreement just stick 75 quid or 200 bucks in your landlord pocket and do your own thing.
4) Paying rent for 2 months up front is also shit
So when I moved to Princes St in Flemington, I had a special deal to stay in this house for 8 weeks @ $100 + $150 DEPOSIT. So I had to transfer $950 to my landlord on the day I moved into the house, rather than paying WEEK 2 WEEK.
I left that house on the 7th week. I may have lost $100 for not staying for another 7 days. But in the end I got my $150 back and it made up for leaving early.
5) If people are giving you the shits, then leave.
If I was in Australia and I had a huge meltdown over ass wipe flatmates complaining about B.O and room odours the only place I could go is my Dads' house in Cairns, My Mum's house in Sydney or my Cousins House in Melbourne. Yet again I could go back to the UK and try to get on their system.
But if things are giving you the shits, you need to get out, go away for a few days and then come back OR FIND A NEW PLACE
When I lived in Melbourne, I shared a bedroom with 7 other people and a house with 9 people. I was the only NATIVE English speaker in the house for sometime. So I just learnt to get along with everyone and nobodty bitched and moaned about B.O
6) Your own room is better than a shared room
So I am a guy who likes to please himself, have loud orgasm (when older women are giving me a rad Hand Job), but I prefer to visit women at their homes and not mine.
When you’re in a shared room with 7 other people, you got no privacy unless you get changed in the bathroom. Also attempting sex on a bunk bed shouldn’t be done, because either one of you are either going to hit your head on the ceiling or the other bunk.
Also when you live in a dormitory room for 2 months, you tend to get sick easily because if one person has the flu, you are bound to get the flu.
7) make sure you get a receipt.
When you pay your landlord a deposit or a bond, Make sure you get a receipt. If your landlord forgets about the bond and won’t give it back you have a receipt to say: "HEY HO I PAID THIS MUCH FOR THE BOND, I HAVE BEEN A GOOD TENANT, and NOTHING HAS BEEN BROKEN OR DAMAGED".
If you have been a bad ass and you have broken stuff in the house then you deserve to lose your bond as it’s to pay for damages.
8) Give plenty of notice when you are going to leave.
If you have to move out of town and go somewhere else (for work). Then you need to let your landlord known at least 1-4 weeks in advance. This is so you can get yourself out of the house on that very day and that your landlord can pay your bond back and your landlord can find a new tenant
Don’t be a dickhead like what I did just by walking out. You need to speak to your landlord and say I need to leave soon, how much notice do you need.
9) Make sure the weekday you move in is also the same weekday you move out.
In my opinion the best days to move into a room is either a Tuesday or Wednesday. Why do I suggest that? It’s so you have a date in your calendar on when you’re going to pay rent.
I moved into my recent room on a Wednesday. So every Wednesday I pay my landlord the rent. By paying my rent on Wednesday I know that I am having 7 days that pass before I have to pay rent again.
It's just it would be a waste of money if you were to pay your last week of rent in Wednesday and then move out Sunday.
So in Melbourne, I moved into my house on a Tuesday and I moved out on a Tuesday.
It’s OK if you pay your landlord every Monday as allot of them expect to be paid on Mondays.