I was a really big Kylie Minogue fan from 1993 till 2008 that was when I was aged between 8 and 22.
After my brother MJ took me to see Dream Theater in January 2008. I realize that I should listen to more METAL and Less POP
So around February 2008, I just lost interest in Kylie Minogue. In the years that came I met allot of Metalhead who hated her music, but loved her appearances as Kylie was a total MILF to my mates.
It was Friday 9th of December 2016. 2 days ago I had completed a 15,000km journey from Vladivostok to London without flying. Once I made it back to the UK I celebrated by spending the night in a great B&B in Dover.
2 days later I was back in London less than 6 months after I left in June 2016. I was walking through my favorite part of London “Hyde Park” when I decided I would go check out what is happening at The Royal Albert Hall.
A week after I left London in June 2016, Heart played a gig at RAH. I was pissed that I wasn’t living in the UK. But then I though oh well it’s not going to be an awesome set list.
When I rocked up to the Royal Albert Hall I saw a photograph of Kylie Minogue. I thought to myself: “Is Kylie Minogue doing another X-mas show?” Then I realized yes she was.
So, I thought to myself: Well I am British, I was born in Australia, I was a Kylie fan for 14 years. Maybe it’s time to treat myself.
I walk on into the Box Office and ask for a cheap ticket. For 80 quid I got really good Circle Seats and I could see all the action.
Kylie Minogue hit the stage at 8pm singing “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” a song I heard Kylie perform at last year’s Royal Variety Performance.
The backup dancer ladies were dressed up like X-mas presents while the bloke were looking like fucking NutCrackers.
Kylie welcomed up to the RAH and she was hoping for a better concert than last year
It’s a song that allot of people like to cover at Christmas time. Paul McCartney wrote this song and I had no idea it was a McCartney tune.
The first part of the ACT was all about Christmas Song. Kylie sang “Santa Clause is coming to Town”
I really loved hearing the song “At Christmas” and seeing all these foxy backup dancing ladies. Especially the two ladies who kept their legs up in the air while wearing RED SHOES. Gosh that so reminds me of banging a MILF while she wore WHITE HEELS
ACT Two was all about Kylie Minogue songs. She started off with “Come Into My World” before launching into the old School “Confide in Me”. Kylie welcomed to the stage “John Grant” a singer I have never heard of before.
Kylie kicked into “The One” a song I have never heard as I haven’t been listening to Kylie for 8 years. Then I realized it was from “X” and I did have that album when I was 22.
ACT III was on and this occurred a costume change for everyone.
Olly Alexander went on stage to sing “Better The Devil You Know” as everyone basically got up and dance. I started headbanging and raising the horns., Because the horns do have a right to be in this song
I know allot of people who hate Kylie Minogue after she released that 3rd album as she was no longer A GOOD GIRL.
Olly Alexander is like pop version of Adam Lambert. Both men are GAY but at least Adam Lambert knows how to do QUEEN.
“celebration” was cranked out as yet again everyone started dancing>
CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES CMON. ……
Al Gore:I WILL!
Kylie then cover East 17 Stay another day. When I was 8 years old EAST 17 were a really cold Boy Band. So I found it weird for Kylie to cover this song
Intermission was called while 50% of the audience got up for a drink or a Bathroom visit.
After the intermission everyone on stage started acting like they were at a Gay Pride Parade. Kylie walked on stage wearing the Gay Flag where out of nowhere Katherine Jenkins appeared wearing a big K on her HAT.
Both ladies sing “Your Disco Need You”, which in my opinion is a really shit song. If you’re going to duet on a Kylie song, then please do “I should be so lucky”
Katherine Jenkins. Is a Welsh opera singer that kicks ass any day of the week. I last saw her live in December 2009. I watch her perform “Heros: on Michael McIntyre's Big Show
Katherine is a woman who knows how to sing anything. So in my opinion she really did wipe the floor with Kylie in this performance.
Kylie started talking about back home in Australia. X-mas in Australia is hotter than Niger, so it made Kylie want to sing 100 degree while all the gay male backup dancer started dancing in boxer short.
“Spinning Around” got me out of my seat dancing and even slapping my ass. It what Kylie did in the music video while wearing 50p HOT PANTS.
Christmas Lights. A COLDPLAY X-mas Song. I didn’t really get it as I am not a fan of Coldplay.
In Act 5 Kylie did a fucked up jazz version of the Locomotion. I really hate the way she sings that song. Like c’mon her original cover was upbeat with snare blast, so why shit on Carol King with Jazz?
But I thought it was amazing to see the female back up dancer strip off their Santa outfits. Guys Every Christmas buy you wife/girlfriend a Mrs. Clause outfit. She will love wearing it
After the lasses had stripped to a new outfit, Kylie sang “LET IT SNOW’ as the stage was dumped with FAKE SNOW.
Santa Baby was up next. Kylie Minogue has been singing this song since 1999. The first time I heard her sing this cover was in 1999 when she went to Timor Leste to entertain UN troop who were fighting Imperialist Dickhead Indonesian in the new nation.
As the orchestra started stringing everyone start clapping and yelling out LA LA LA LA LA LA. As Kylie launched into “Can’t get you out of my head:” as everyone started dancing
Kylie did another cover of “Everybody’s free (feel good)”. Next up she was singing the Bee Gees “Night Fever” as I was yelling out DISCO SUCK! Dance music is fucking retarded so if your parents hated DISCO in the 70’s you had every right to hate dance music in the 80’s, 90’s 00’s and 2010’s
Kylie started singing “All the Lovers’ which got everyone starting to sing along. Throughout the night I was yelling out crap like
SCREAM FOR ME ROYAL ALBERT HALL
SCREAM FOR ME SYDNEY
SCREAM FOR ME LONDON
LISTEN TO DREAM THEATER
During this song I couldn’t help but yell out “DANGER DANGER” I was doing a repeat of what I did at Olivia Newton-John 2012 concert.
Kylie went off stage as well all started SCREAMING FOR AN ENCORE
Kylie went back on stage to sing “Silent Night” with the choir and orchestral. It was pretty cool to hear a classic.
We all had to sing along to the Jason Fucking Donovan part of “Especially for You”. This would make my cousins husband Dave jealous as I have seen Kylie 3 times, kissed her sister Dannii and prank called Jason Donovan.
Kylie ended the night on a high by singing “I wish It could be Christmas Everyday” A cover by the Glam Rock band Wizzard.
The next night I was back at the Royal Albert Hall to do it all again. It was the same shit, but I got to dance with a married lady.