When I lost my virginity (with a curvy mid 30’s lady called Carol Jane) at aged 24 I was thinking of 3 songs in my head that are like the best songs to think of or listen to when you’re getting laid.
2 months later I was watching the Christian Metal band Stryper. As they played “Reach Out” I raised up my hands and said “forgive me Lord for having pre-marital sex”. I didn't get laid for close to 3 years until I went to Amsterdam in June 2013
But seriously the music of Stryper is enough to make you want to be a Christian with a chastity belt. I still listen to Stryper but i don't ask Buddha, Satan or Hallie Selassie to forgive me since i "GET OFF AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE"
Ask any lady from New Zealand if they know about Rachel Hunter and they will know how she dated KIP WINGER in the early 90's before tying it up with Rod Stewart.
"Can’t get Enuff" is the opening track off "In the Heart of The Young" it’s all about a guy who cannot get enough of seeing his lady friend and how it’s never enough. It’s hilarious to watch the video and see a woman peeling off all her clothing in a photo booth.
Winger music is some of the best music to listen to when you’re getting laid. Someday I always wish I was Kip Winger as his music has been a big influence in my love making
I used to be obsessed with her shitty music when I was 18 and 19 but my mother feared I was becoming a bit gay. If you want my honest opinion I could only ever listen to one record and that is "Soul Kiss". I am not gay and last time I checked I love women. But I only ever went to that Olivia concert in March 2012 so I could get sober and heckle ANDY TIMMONS of DANGER DANGER
The title track is about a woman who gets down on her knees and begs. So it’s basically a woman begging to give you a RAD BLOWJOB. So a "Soul Kiss" is pretty much a blowjob, or 50 euros is what i once paid in Amsterdam
Whoever wrote the song should have offered it to a metal lady like Lita Ford instead of a wash up musician
This song was originally written by French-Canadian Lisa Dalbello in 1984 in the video she demonstrates safe sex by putting cling wrap over her mouth. Have any of you people ever used a *dental dam* when performing oral sex on a lady? I once asked a lady that and she told me she never even bothered
Every time I see a hot mature woman in a city bar I always tell myself "Gonna Get Close To You" so I talk to allot of women these days and it’s just to help my confidence. I seriously would fall head over heel for a woman who is 1) a redhead and 2) a Queensryche fan
The video portraits Geoff Tate as a stalker but if you ask Geoff Tate is plain as Black and White and is a Lunatic and a fool who is wasting his time making music these days.
The album artwork for “Love at First Sting” shows a couple locked in a pose while the lady is getting a tattoo done.
The song represents a person’s presence and how he is going to rock this woman like a hurricane in the bedroom. The video shows women pushing on a fence trying to get closer to the band
"Love at first sting" is something everyone wants as you want to get laid first meeting
When I first heard this song at Live 8 2005 I instantly became a Def Leppard fan and that band has influenced me to be an awesome Pommy man in many ways.
I always misread the song about taking an incredible wank. Or the song could be about doing 6 lines off a woman.
It’s a song so nice they named it twice just like the band. When you press play on that record and hear the creepy voice at the Intro saying "Let’s get naughty naughty" it’s the start of something nasty.
'LETS GET NAUGHTY NAUGHTY, DOWN AND DIRTY" It always seem that Glam band have the best love making songs. I find it amusing they can put an audio sample of Ted Poley trying to hook up with a stripper but getting bitch slapped in doing so.
I had to include a Warlock song on my list since DORO is a huge MILF even though she never had kids. It just reminds you of a lover being inside your heart forever.
I think any band that makes a reference to women, alcohol,weapons and bastards need to be in this playlist. I think it's always been the opening track on every Bastardizer gig I have been to. But the thing is Thrash/Black metal music doesn't really go together with love making
Its about a song of a guy that falls in love with a hooker he calls “Mama” AND how she doesn’t have feelings for a client. The saying goes "love them then leave them and forget them". Phil Collins must have been a huge pleased man during a time after he broke up with his wife.
10) Still in Love With You Virgin Steele
When i first listened to Virgin Steele i just fell head over heels for this song. Its the song you play after you leave someones house after an hour long "roll in the hay" and how you are "Still in Love" with a lady with benefits or a girlfriend who dumped you.
This song could make any lonely bloke drop his pants and jack off in the sink because he would be thinking "Oh i wish Carol Cox didn't stood me down and now I’m wasting all this Jizz in my hotel bathroom”
Virgin Steele 1993 Whitesnake inspired album "Life Amongst the Ruins" has allot of loving make music in it. Especially "Too Hot to Handle", "Sex Religion Machine" and "Love is Pain"
Touch Me~ Samantha Fox
Every time I hear this song I feel like I want to make love to a woman who loves pop music but hates metal. I don’t think I could ever get it up if this song was playing in the background. Being British it’s our unofficial hook up anthem.
Samantha Fox is a bit of a MILF these days but it’s a shame she turned out queer. But that's life
If I Can’t Have You~ Kim Wilde
The year was 1993, I was at 8 year old who started wasting 12 years of his life listening to shitty music. But the music of 1993 will always be remembered for being Awesome even if It was Heavy Metal or Pop rock.
Kim Wilde had just had a successful 13 year career in the music business and was about to top it off by covering a Bee Gees pend song.
The lyrics are sung in a passionate way but the music video shows Kim Wilde knocking over some shit in her house and even taking her top off. I got my first erection at age 8 after watching that video. At the time I was watching video's on Channel 10 "Video Hits" such as “Physical”, “I Should be so Lucky” made me realize that yes women are good at peeling off all their clothing and
Real life Scenarios
One time I was visiting a mature woman Foriengers “I Wanna Know What Love Is” came on the radio and I though to myself "Yes I do know was love is thank you very much"
After I got out of the shower Whitesnake “Is This Love” came on the radio and I told her about my love of WHITESNAKE 1987
Some days in my life when I know I am going to go get laid I play these songs and even watch the videos to remind myself that I got to perform well in the bedroom.
Because without these songs I don’t think the Testosterone within me would me working and I would be dropping my pants infront of my Doctor to show that my testosterone replacement theraphy isnt working well.
When I am in the bedroom my mind will start playing all these songs I know about. Ill be thinking about Winger, Queen of the Ryche, Soul Kissed, Scorpions and all the others i can think about.
As I always say. Use a JIMMY HAT and forget what Pope Francis says about using contraception. Life is too short, get off as much as possible.
Fat Eddie: UH YEAH I NEED A JIMMY HAT, LOVE GLOVE, SALAMI SLING, DIPPER SLIPPER?